Yesterday we discussed looking at the shaping influences in our children’s lives. In chapter 3 of Shepherding A Child’s Heart, Tedd Tripp looks at developing a Godward orientation in your child.
Now understand, the principles outlined in Tedd’s book are directed at Christians like me, and we obviously feel that God’s Word is the ultimate authority that should govern our lives. That said, like all wisdom, these principles are applicable to those who live outside of faith in Christ and a biblical worldview as well. Today’s topic is a perfect example.
Two issues today, that are making your child for tomorrow are:
1.) Those shaping influences we looked at yesterday
2.) Their Godward or at least moral orientation.
As we parent, how do you view the development of the shaping influences showing up in your child’s behavior? Are you beginning to think that all hope is lost? As if the label of “slow” or “A.D.D./A.D.H.D” or “bad” is something that they will carry for the rest of their lives? Do you think your child is a genius and will always be the smartest, cutest and most athletic in any social group? We as parents often think these thoughts, and we sometimes even treat that “special” child better than the others in the family.
Plus remember, we are made to change and I don’t know about you, but I’ve “reinvented myself” several times. We have become a society that puts “lifetime product labels” on each other and ourselves as if we were manufactured from an assembly line. But what we have done, seen, heard, etc. only influences our shape, it does not create a permanent mold.
I can’t watch the video above enough…
Second, what role do you play in their Godly orientation? Again, you may not be a Christian reading this, but if you teach your son not to rape women, break into my house and to be respectful, we can be neighbors. What’s one of the most common laments of so many teachers today? That these values are not being taught at home and kids are coming to the college campus preying on young women, stealing anything they can from school lockers or the teacher’s parking lot or fighting at every chance.
What idols do you already see in your child?
Is the Xbox/PS the most important thing in their life?
Is interaction through the cell phone and social media far more important than with the rest of the family?
Is their value based on whatever their peers decide?
So many other questions could be thrown out there, but those are just a few conversation starters.
Now what role will you play in analyzing and influencing what shapes them and giving them moral instruction?
Many times kids learn how to cheat by watching the pros. You know, those of us who would not dare to break into someone’s home, but we may have items from the company at home knowing they will not be returned. Perhaps we have them lie on the phone (which is harder to do with cell phones these days) when the bill collector calls, or maybe it’s the extra sauce laid on those taxes every year to get more money back or less taken. Whatever it is, we are the best teachers, and nobody learns more from us, than our children.